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How to Talk to Your Kids About School Shootings

Aug 27, 2025

Today’s Minneapolis school shooting can leave both parents and children shaken. As kids across Minnesota prepare to head back to school, it’s natural for them to feel anxious or scared. Parents may also feel uncertain about how to offer comfort and reassurance without creating more fear. Remember, this conversation is for them—do your best to be in a grounded place before you begin. It’s important to show emotions they can recognize, but even more important to offer them your steadiness and reassurance. This experience may stir overwhelming feelings for all of us, but your role is to be their support. If you find yourself needing care too, reach out to your own safe supports.

These conversations are difficult, but they’re also important. Children look to trusted adults for guidance, especially during times of uncertainty. Here are some ways to approach the conversation with care, honesty, and support.

1. Start with What They Know

Children often hear about traumatic events through friends, social media, or even snippets of adult conversation. Begin by asking:

• “What have you heard?”
• “How are you feeling about it?”

This gives you a sense of their understanding and helps you correct misinformation. Keep your responses simple and age-appropriate. For younger children, provide basic reassurance; for teens, invite open discussion.

2. Reassure Their Safety

After hearing about a tragedy, children often wonder if it could happen to them. Reassure them that schools, teachers, and communities work hard to keep students safe. While you can’t promise nothing bad will ever happen, you can emphasize the many measures in place to protect them.

For example, you might say:

• “Your school has safety plans and teachers who care deeply about keeping you safe.”
• “There are a lot of adults working together to protect students.”

3. Be Honest but Limit Details

Children don’t need to know every detail of the incident. Instead, focus on the facts in a calm, straightforward way. Avoid graphic descriptions and limit exposure to news coverage, which can heighten anxiety.

4. Encourage Questions and Feelings

Let your child know it’s okay to feel scared, angry, or sad. Normalize their emotions by saying:

• “It makes sense to feel worried when we hear about something like this.”
• “I feel sad too, but we’re going to get through it together.”

Answer questions honestly, but if you don’t know the answer, it’s okay to say so.

5. Keep Routines Consistent

Consistency helps children feel secure. Stick to regular schedules for meals, school, and bedtime. Familiar routines send the message that life is steady, even when the world feels uncertain.

6. Model Calm and Care

Children take cues from adults. While it’s natural to feel upset, showing calm and steady reassurance helps kids manage their own emotions. Practice self-care so you can provide support with a clear, grounded presence.

7. Know When to Seek Extra Help

If your child shows ongoing signs of anxiety—such as sleep problems, withdrawal, or reluctance to attend school—it may be time to seek additional support. Therapy can provide a safe space for children and families to process feelings and learn coping skills.

Additional Resources

If you or your child need additional support, there are numerous resources available to you. Some of them include:

• Cope: Mobile Crisis Response (Hennepin County) – 612-596-1223.
• Mental Health Crisis Lines by County – https://mn.gov/dhs/people-we-serve/adults/health-care/mental-health/resources/crisis-contacts.jsp
• NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) – Call the NAMI Helpline at 800-950-NAMI, or text “NAMI” to 741741. org has online discussion groups and video resources
• Crisis text line, available 24/7 – Text “HOME” to 741741, or visit org for text, online chat, and WhatsApp options
• County crisis line – Dial **crisis from a mobile phone
• Walk in Counseling Center – Free counseling services via telehealth. Schedule an appointment on their website, org.

• Minnesota Day One Crime Victim Support Line – Call 1‑866‑385‑2699 or text 612‑399‑9977